There’s no denying that something disruptive happens to women around midlife. It happens to men too, but it’s more obvious in women, especially since our hormonal makeup is a bit more complicated. The extreme hormonal shifts that occur around this time forces us to think more about ourselves and what our purpose in life is. It seems to blindside us, like a lifetime of repressed “stuff” has finally had enough and won’t let us shove it in the dark corners of our depth anymore. Most commonly, our current careers become the target of a smear campaign. We’ve tolerated it long enough and it becomes evident that we’re not doing it because we love it. In fact, we’re not doing anything because we love it. WTF??
Biologically and hormonally speaking, women start their teen years preparing to procreate. Their minds as well as their bodies change and they enter a decades-long phase of nurturing, starting with menstruation. Even those who don’t have children are programmed to do as much as they can to help others feel good. And as ladder climbers, the action of putting aside their own needs in order to fulfill those of others is reinforced. But as that nurturing phase starts to fade out in midlife (beginning in perimenopause), women start experiencing abrupt feelings of “what about me???” They soon realize that what they’re spending forty hours or more on every week isn’t fulfilling or meaningful.
This stage in a woman’s life can be incredibly disruptive. Their lives have been stuck in status quo mode for so long and now it’s as if she’s awoken from her 30 year dream, only to find herself as the sad clown surrounded by happy circus characters. And every time she tries to speak up, others react as though she’s rocking the boat so much that it’ll tip and kill everyone in it. But not rocking the boat is no longer an option. The common urge is to find a more meaningful career, and the quicker they realize that this is a decision for them and no one else, the quicker they can start looking seriously at where they want to be in life. The possibilities are endless, and once women start shedding the fears that hold them back and caring less about how others will respond, the path becomes easier to see.
